What’s Next

After months of con­fu­sion, inner tur­moil, and lots of angst.… this exper­i­ment has come to an end.

My boyfriend and I broke up last week.

I am incred­i­bly sad we couldn’t make it work. He is a fan­tas­tic per­son — just not fan­tas­tic for me as a roman­tic part­ner. There are def­i­nite­ly things we could have done bet­ter, and I’m tak­ing those things away as lessons to not repeat in the future.

I tru­ly wish him the very best in life and all the hap­pi­ness in the world.

It’s weird — in the past, my ex-boyfriends have all been douch­es that have done ter­ri­ble things to me (like that one guy that broke up with me over Snapchat…) so I had that right­eous anger and indig­na­tion to fall back on to get me through the breakup. I don’t have that this time because it was no one’s fault. I just feel sad.

I am incred­i­bly GLAD we took the leap and tried to make it work. I learned a ton about myself, what I need from a part­ner, and what a ful­fill­ing life looks like to me. Even though the out­come isn’t what I want­ed, I’m not plagued by the “what if”. I know what hap­pened and I’m glad we tried.

Check out what he has to say about recent events.

shit
Found this at the cor­ner cof­fee shop this weeked

What’s Next

After it became clear to me we weren’t going to work out, I start­ed to make plans. As my free­lanc­ing efforts ‘suc­ceed­ed’ in part thanks to his gen­eros­i­ty with keep­ing my expens­es low, I’m try­ing to fig­ure out what I want to do with my time. I get to decide where I live, what career I want, and what lev­el of work I apply to. Not many peo­ple have that free­dom.

I have been apply­ing to go back to cor­po­rate jobs. I do not want to hear any “I told you so’s” because while the vast major­i­ty of you are kind and won­der­ful peo­ple, there are a few trolls that have popped up since I start­ed free­lanc­ing. I have a job free­lanc­ing right now — the only prob­lem is I can’t live off the wage it pro­duces.

I decid­ed since I’ve been work­ing my butt off late­ly, I might as well go back to the cor­po­rate world and make lots of mon­ey instead of a few bucks here and there. I am look­ing at get­ting back into my for­mer career of IT Exec­u­tive Sup­port, so if any­one has an “in” to that kind of job shoot me an email!

In the mean­time, I can’t stay here in Min­neapo­lis in his house. It’s too painful for both of us and delay­ing the heal­ing work we both need to do. If it were any oth­er time of year, I’d head down south to Dal­las to stay with friends that have offered a room for Mew and me. How­ev­er, the hol­i­days are rapid­ly approach­ing. Since I’d have to go home for the hol­i­days, I might as well just stay there.

I am incred­i­bly grate­ful I have that sup­port sys­tem to fall back on. I took this chance know­ing they’d be there if things fell apart. I can’t say I would’ve done this oth­er­wise.

The Stuff

I’ve talked in the past about hav­ing a lot of stuff. Even though I haven’t bought much in the last few years, and got­ten rid of a TON of stuff, I still have quite a few pos­ses­sions that need to be moved out of his house. My parent’s house doesn’t have room for it, so I can’t just take it with me to their house. I looked into get­ting a POD, but I’m not sure I can afford $200 a month with my vari­able income. I thought about get­ting a stor­age unit here in Min­neapo­lis, but prices are high­er thanks to the large met­ro­pol­i­tan area and I didn’t want to have to come back in the win­ter to get my stuff once I fig­ure out where I’m going.

So, I’m tak­ing the stuff with me. I thought about get­ting a stor­age unit close to my parent’s house, but then I remem­bered I have a friend with a huge house and a giant emp­ty attic. She has gra­cious­ly offered the use of her attic to store my belong­ings as long as I need. I will be giv­ing her some mon­ey month­ly for it because I can afford a lit­tle and she needs the mon­ey. Hope­ful­ly, I won’t need to store it there for too long!

Once I fig­ure out where I’m going, I can plan on how to move it to the new loca­tion, but I’m not going to wor­ry about that now.

I picked up about 40 box­es from a lady on Craigslist for free, so I’ve got that aspect cov­ered. They smell like old lady flow­ery per­fume and sad­ness, but they cost me nada so I’m grate­ful. My stuff can always air out lat­er.

The Future

My plan is to apply for full-time jobs while also work­ing on free­lance assign­ments. So far, I’ve had good luck with con­tent man­age­ment gigs but it’s been a chal­lenge to make those hap­pen while deal­ing with the fall­out of my per­son­al life falling apart. That should get eas­i­er with time.

If 2019 rolls around and no one has hired me, I plan to explore liv­ing in the South. I have the afore­men­tioned friends in Dal­las and options in Geor­gia. After I get hired, I’ll move there. I’m total­ly open to mov­ing pret­ty much any­where in the world. Some places sound more fun than oth­ers, but for the short-term, I just want to get back into the full-time work­ing world. I plan to keep as many of the free­lanc­ing gigs as I can while work­ing full-time.

I feel like now is an excel­lent time to put my nose to the grind­stone and do some work. Who knows, maybe my free­lanc­ing efforts will flour­ish when there isn’t so much pres­sure to make mon­ey off of them.

Final Thoughts

As we are both involved in this per­son­al finance blog­ging com­mu­ni­ty, I don’t want any­one to feel like they have to take sides. We will remain friends through the years — just not as good of friends as we once were.

My heart is hurt­ing, but ulti­mate­ly I feel this is the right move for both of us.

Wish me luck on the new adven­ture I get to take on!

As always, thanks for read­ing! What’s your favorite awful chick flick movie? I’m run­ning out of options 🙂 

 

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